How do you show up for yourself?
How you show up for yourself is directly related to how others show up for you. This includes your partner or a partner you attract. This also includes your friends.
If you don’t show yourself compassion and understanding when you say or do something you didn’t mean to, this is what others will mirror back. Maybe you are very critical of yourself and expect you will always do and say the “right” thing but if you have this expectation of yourself it brings your value of yourself down in your own eyes.
If you don’t accept your imperfections, you may be very judgmental of yourself. It makes it hard to show unconditional love to yourself because there are parts of you that you don’t accept.
If you don’t value your time, others will not value it either. If you don’t follow through with plans with others and time commitments for yourself, others will cancel plans last minute and not commit to planning ahead. They won’t respect your time since you don’t respect your time.
If you don’t allow yourself the space to feel your emotions, you show others that your feelings don’t matter. The more you deny your emotions, the less authentic you become and the less love you can feel for yourself.
If you don’t honor and prioritize your needs, others won’t either. You may end up neglecting your own needs to take care of someone else’s and they will continue to allow and expect this and it will become a habit.
If you reject or abandon yourself when things go wrong or are difficult, you show yourself that you can’t be there for you. You begin not to have trust in yourself that you will be okay no matter what happens. Others will feel this distrust as well. You may lose trust in yourself and your relationship. And others will mirror that energy.
If you want to attract a partner who will honor your truth and your values, respect you, love and accept you the way you are, you first have to be completely comfortable with who you are and honor and love who you are.
There is no shortcut such as “if I find a partner who loves me then I can relax and love and honor myself.” This will not happen because you need to begin with your love and commitment to yourself. When you depend of this need being solely fulfilled by another person, you begin to expect this of them. The more expectations you have, the more pressure it puts on the relationship. The more it drains the relationship. Depending more and more on your partner may even create some fear…because instead of fulfilling your own needs you are completely looking to him to do this and you may fear what if this is taken away.
Commit to showing up for yourself in a loving and accepting and kind way every day. If you are interested in learning more about how to make this commitment to yourself and transform your relationship and your life, reach out to me for a free 30 minute clarity session. https://debbiegailcoaching.com